As I watched the historical ceremony unfold at Westminister Abbey today, I noticed many things. Not only how radiant Princess Kate was, the dress was absolutely stunning! I always say "simple is best", and she wore it with such elegance. I noticed how nervous she looked right before it was her turn to repeat her vows. I'm pretty sure William told her she looked beautiful when she stepped up beside him, and at one point ever so smoothly winked at his beautiful bride. I had to watch it a second time to catch all these little tid bits! It was adorable when they walked out onto the balcony and Kate said "Oh my!" with a look of delightful shock when she realized what looked like all of London had turned out to wish them well. I thought it was romantic the way William leaned in to say "One more? One more kiss?" as the crowed chanted for yet another Royal Smooch. If I'm reading his lips right it looks like that's what he said, or maybe I'm just an incurable romantic!
A Royal Marriage
As I sat staring at a blank screen, trying to collect my thoughts, the final address given by The Right Honourable. Dr. Richard Chartres keeps going over and over in my mind. He opened his address with a quote of St Cathrine of Siena "Be who God meant you to be and you will set the world on fire." Very powerful words for any married couple, but to the future King of England? Even more of a challenge! I pray he and Kate will one day live up to those words. I never really thought of marriage as that great a conquest, but can you imagine if every husband and wife made it their goal to allow God to make their marriage what He means for it to be. What a wonderful world we would live in!
The reason so many unions do not portray Christ's love and end in divorce is because of selfishness, the Reverend addressed it almost immediately following St. Cathrine's words when he said:
"...the more we give of self, the richer we become in soul, the more we go beyond ourselves in love, the more we become our true selves and our spiritual beauty is more fully reveled. In marriage we are seeking to bring each other into fuller life. It is of course hard to ween ourselves away from self-centerdness and people can do such a thing, but the hope should be fulfilled it is necessary that a solemn decision is made that whatever the difficulties we are committed to the way of generous love."
Truer words have never been spoken! We all go into marriage wondering what we can get out of it. I know that when I married my husband, Ben, my thought wasn't "I'm going to be the best wife I can be and make Ben so deliriously happy that he'll never be in a bad mood!" Ben and I were talking about the selfish mindset we all have when we go into a relationship. It's all about what we can get out of a relationship what "can this person do for me" "How can they make me feel?" It's never, "what I can give to this relationship?" The sad thing is we live in a "me society". We're always running so fast about our lives that we rarely take the time to notice others around us, let alone what we can do to enrich their lives. This mindset is what is killing marriages by the thousands! We have got to retrain our brains to think about how we can make our spouse happy. We've got to learn what makes them smile, what makes them cry, the things they enjoy doing and what they love!
One last quote from the Reverend's final address that stuck with me, "As the reality of God has faded from so many lives in the West, there's been a corresponding inflation of expectations, that personal relations alone will supply meaning and happiness in life. This is to load our partner with to great a burden. We're all incomplete, we all need the love which is secure rather than oppressive. We need mutual forgiveness in order to thrive. But as we move toward our partner in love following the example of Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit is quickened within us and can increasingly fill our lives with light." Our complete happiness should never be put on the shoulders of a human relationship. If we are going to have a Royal Marriage, we must also have a deep and meaningful relationship with our Lord Jesus Christ. He alone holds the key to our complete happiness. Until we surrender our will to His we will never be able to have the beautiful marriage He desires us to have. Until we love our mate the way Christ intended, we will never have a heavenly marriage.
I like how Reverend Chartres' talked about a "generous love", a generous love is a love that is given freely with no thought to what you will get in return. When we learn to love generously that's when we will achieve a Royal Marriage.
My heart felt congratulations go out to Prince William and his Princess Kate. I pray that they will heed the words of the Reverend and learn to give that generous love he spoke of, for then will they not only have had a Royal Wedding, but also a glorious Royal Marriage. May God bless you both William and Kate!
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